memories.

again i read up my old blog with him.. it hurts so much. how much i put in.. how much time we shared all tat gone to waste. sometimes i wish for those times again.. it still hurts.. so much... haish.. mister boo.. haish..

memories.. they hurts at the same time they remind.

Y 2/24/2005 11:47:00 PM

Stolen.

listening to some jaysean todae. feeling a bit stolen from the hearta! hehe. woke up todae due to constant screaming / emocore version of my mom. she screaming for us to wake up cause she is bored and she wanna go out. wad .. *sigh* in the end woke up and she toking about taking neoprints.. haha. funny lar my mommy sumtimes.. funny the scary way~ then here i am blogging shits.

slept quite late lar yesterday so the after effect : still sleepy. wanting to get back to sleep but the weather so hawt sia.. cannot sleep eventho my fan blasting. so sad.. cause air cons are not allowed to be on in the day in our home. sheesh~ hehe never mind gonna shower oso later. mite be going to Auntie Emi's house. see how lar if not lazy. but lazy lar. how lar. wuaha.

a day out with baby danial and his mummy and yes i came late. haha. sorrie lar. then met her up in town and then went to take Neoprints.. and then went to eat.. courtesy of Lynn!!! tanks lar dey!! hehe. and then we went to Fizah's workplace.. got three new stones bangles.. rasta colour lar sia! tanks for making it for me! and then she took a break and went to fareast again and take more neoprints...!!! weee fun fun fun! tis friday meeting up again to get more prints. wuahaha. sumtimes its nice to meet old friends..~ she is still with Shahidin tis Fizah.. 6 years and running. damn. hope they get married soon! hehe. then went back to woodlands and hang out with Lynn before going home. tired but still manage to log in and do a blog for Onie. hehe. *wink*

haffa lil conference tinggy with Nadz and Onie. i slept a few times but then okie lar finally awake. then had a lovely tok with Onie. hope he do well with his test todae. pray hard for him la. i noe he can do it. so no worries~ *smiles*

wuargh! hot sia the weather. fuckadey. im hungry la. and thirsty. and all tat have in my home is tubs of sweets. and i dunno wad sweet. fuck.
tomoro working evening so yeah! can go out todae.. hehe

to Mat Noor:
im sorry of wad happened to ur friend. i hope u hang in there. it mus been tuff for u but im glad that u turned to me to tok to..and i hope to make u smile.. and i hope the yesterday tok put ur mind off a bit .. so dun grieve sumtin tat already happened k. i hope u make it thru and get well thru it.. im always here to give u a helping hand and a listening ear. remember tat a friend is always here for you *huggies* take care..
deepest condolences to victim's friends..family..gf *amin*

tis make me realise how short ur life span can be. one min u can be sitting down luffing wit ur friends and another min ure gone jus like tat. wad sia! haiz. life...

xx[ semut pakai skirt ]xx

Y 2/22/2005 12:01:00 PM

Congress Via Safri.

wadda fcuk sia congress via safri.. haha i oso dunno~ aniwae im so dead tired! i dunno wad happen and then got home early and then i zz. wuaha. was on da fone with Safri and Boyok. toking shits la. i hate toking to them. they have noting to tok about except shits. wuaha. cute people.

aniwae work was okie. had a fun time with ShuMei. laughed about drinking and clubbing. and then finish at 3.15 dot so not time spare and feel bored. lucky sia.so went to dome to see some peeps.a little onli was there.. so went back. hehe tired sia.

toking on da fone with *him* suddenli i fell asleep until now. now he waiting for me to call him.. hehe sowie..todae he call me up at 4.30am to wake me up to work. but wasnt in the mood realli to tok to him... sad lar he overnite outside then never call me. heheh tunjuk perasaan arh konon... lepas tu nak step merajok and then miss him... wuahahha. psst i tink i have fallen for u boy..haha *shy* he noes aniwae. wuahaha u tau i pon tak tau...wuahaha.

im tired. im tired im T I R E D... hehe

meeting lynn tomoro with baby danial yey! cant wait bebeh! gonna have a baby day out lar dey! hehe.



*Lynn and Baby & Fizah..* long lost bestfriends arh! haha
congratulations aniwae! hehe

Y 2/20/2005 11:26:00 PM

hi i am your friend. fuck you.

wahey wahey so warm sia my room. practically all *lekit lekit* man. damn. aniwae wads up wit the weather nowadays..so hot sia! wad fuck sia. damn it. but nvm..its all in god's hands.. hehe.

updates? ... hmmm... shits happens. well basically Serangkai having some "tsunamic" issues. waves and currents going on. a lot of true hatred for tis and tat passing on. lotsa M.I.A issue. and also a lot of erm..u noe? i oso dunno! wuahaha. haiz.
Shida: been having lotsa tings on her mind. but i make sure im there (besides zul) by her side.. besides eventho she mite be having a guy.. its always nice to noe at least a friend cares... i tink so? hehe. but i pray and hope she gets out of her hectic world soon.. i noe she can do it.. she is a strong lil lady.. hehe and i knew she meant well for her serious friendship.. especially wen she took care of me on tat unfateful day *blackcat* wuahaha...
eventhough we both cried.. and u felt bad for not being there with me at the chalet.. i dun blame u sweetie..i never did... and i regret wad happened but i never held it to ANIONE of my serangkais.. so dun 'fraid about feeling guilty cause i still love u as much as i love the other ladies in dome..serangkais... *smiles*
Farz: had a wonderful time out with her twice at Esplanade. once with her by the bay.. and the latest at Esplanade Roof Terrace. shared lotsa tings about life and happenings... tanks for the time... hehehe eventho we hardly is there for each other due to work and skool.. remember we are always the serangkais.. hehe...
Nadia: tings have been ruff.. been spending lesser time together.. mebe cause she is working? or i am working? but.. it seems we dun have time for each other together... well i really hope one day the serangkais wud be like last time... hopefully.

tings for me have been great.. work life been okie... tings between *him* and me seems merrier.. but we are jus still friends. still lotsa PANTUN going on. wuaha. and alot of I PUN TAK TAU wuahah tinggy going on.. hehe but im still wary..of all the tings tat happened. im just not healed yet by the last mamat incident. scared. mebe someday.. one thing for sure *he* cannot be rely on. ask to wake me up at 4.30 he will wake u up an hour later. wuahah~ but he is such a sweetheart. hanya yang rapat tau saper dia.. wuahaha aku pon tak tau!!! *huggies*

been spending time at dome with the guys. been great. tu jer.. mahlust nak update.. wuahaha.

till then.. take care.

xx[ friends are meant to be there ]xx

Y 2/18/2005 11:46:00 PM

Valentine's Day To Lovers.

so yeah yet again the month for lovers is here.. dum dee dum. i can say im not celebrating it cause its against my religion but then again.. i got no valentine lor! wuahaha. so wont deny it. if i have i wud celebrate it.. lucky for me work decided to take over so i wont feel miserable. imagine if i get a day off todae.. damn! i wud prolly be all emoistic and rot at home. wuaha. i hate love~

never get to tok to *him* yesterdae. he was sleeping...i tink~ but then tok to my sweetie short fart Boyok...i mish him la.. and then he tok to me about wad shit oso i dunno.. finally falling back to sleep.. @ 2+am *he* called. but then i was soooo sleepy. so decided to sleep. the both of us decided to jus sleep. wuaha. and then Lan called.. and then Boyok called again.. argh argh! by the time boyok called me i was so pissed. all i wanted was to sleep! wuaha. sorrie k for scolding u~ mwaks!

getting ready to go work now.. shiela just left for work. so now im gonna go ready for my work. damn lar i hate afternoon shift. never do afternoon before ..hope its okie~ okie lar.. hehe. k lar wanna go get ready.. Happy Valentine Day to my sweethearts..
isis and makaveli.. (macam nama india siak)
farz and doink..
Aidil and nini..
....and all those in love~ and loving each other aite. mwaks~

xx[ who am i ]xx

Y 2/14/2005 10:54:00 AM

...suddenli i felt like going back to the old blog. the old blog her and him use to share. and wen i got there... the date shows : 13th January. exact one month since i last check or update the blog. one month exactly since i last talk or even see him. one month since we both cried to each other. one month since we said our last uber goodbyes. and one month since we last sing our song together.
few days back i listened to Boys 2 Men - On bended knees.. and i shed tears in the bus.. cause the part tat he use to sing to me.. his voice.. haiz. i miss him so much. i still do after so long.
his voice.. his touch.. his words.. his love i wish to have.. but then i gotta be strong.. *smiles* i lost sometin and i gotta move on..jus wanna say tat after one month i accidentally came back to a blog which brings so much memories....beautiful memories.....

a poem i wrote for him (back then) :

u are a special guy with special love
u shine my life oh so bright
our love is free just like a dove
against all odds we will fight

as one we move towards life
as one we fight every right
as one we promise to always strive
as one we hold together the light

promised to love each other forever
promised to be there for each other too
as man and his lady loving each other
man:"i love u" lady:"I love u too".

in loving memories. missing those times~

Y 2/13/2005 04:44:00 PM

kecoh week.

first up HALOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. wow i felt as if ive not been updatin like so many days but padahal padahal. onli how many days. siao ah me. i hate the weather. its hot and sunny. not good time to go out and chill outdoors. nice weather to get a tanned. tats wad Dome kiddos are doing frequently now..getting themselve tanned. wuaha. no all black and charred.

erm...went to esplanade on Thursday nite with Farz. went to meet Nad and ma sis. chilled by the bay eating some Japanese Pizza and noodles..puffing away wen suddenli a BANGLA decide to flirt with us. TURN OFF SIA. wad fuck sia and then he tot i was soooo into him.. said sumtin like "tengok sikit la.. lawa la.. senyum la.." i was so scared sia. and farz was luffing at me the whole time. tat Mudafucker. haha then decided to go off. and he said he wanna pay for my cab fare.. suddenli he stalk from behind seh! wahhhhhhh we went to the carnival he still stalking. imagine if anione of us is alone! wad fuck. and then after an hour of stalking and tryin to run away from him.. he gave up and left. wuahaha. then waited till 2am before heading home with ma sister and the rest. tanks farz for time spend together. if was stoopid but good. wuaha.

friday went to work and went back home. nothing much. went to dome and kiddos having their own break sessions and battle. went there and nini and erm friends were there. nice to see her again. she looks different. i told her. BUT I DUNNO WAD. hmmm as i predicted.. i guess she sheds some weight. i guess so. she looks..erm..younger..erm smaller.. especially her face chin area. nice!~ so yeah went home at 8. then did anitin tat supposed to be done. wuahaha *padahal tak ingat aper jadi*

then yesterdae went to meet the Bonnie and Clyde.. Zul and Shidada.. my <3'ers. i love them dearly k. met them at Jurong East MRT and then proceed to Boon Lay to chill and talk some shits.. yeah and then proceed to dome.. no one was there so i decided to go home.. shidada crashed at Zul crib. and got home soooo freakishly tired. tok to him and he wanted to go out for some gathering or sumtin like tat.. so i slept zzzzz.. tats wad i do best. sleep~ hehe and then at 2100 hours my dad woke me up saying i got an urgent call... dragged myself tot he fone and it was shidada asking me to come down to dome. important matter and i got ready sleepily! haha. and then wen there. did some serious shits stuff... emo stuff.. and then everythin got back to normal.. and the lads have to bring in the roots of all evil.. liquors here and there..s c a r y shits lar. i made a promise after yesterdae I WILL NEVER do tat again with the civic dome. tanks to shidada especially and those hu took care of me and took me home.. im sorry for causing trouble.. sorry if i said anitin wrong. tanks. went home.. and slept. freakishly tired until Husni called me up.. he was concerned.. was afraid for my safety.. and after reassuring im okie he calmed down. tok to him about MAMAT. haiz. and then finally he fell asleep on da fone. HIS TURN!!!!! hahahha. yey yey~ u lost.! and then i went to sleep...

he is working todae. at sentosa some bartending stuff. working till evening. he called me already so okie oreadi lar.. at least get to tok to him. haha. remembered tat day he went to work .. he smsed me wen i was at work about how he was suffocating sitting next to a Bangla and the smell was unbearable. wuahahah. kept luffing to myself. haha . stoopid but funny lar tat boy. wuaha. suppose to go out with him tomoro but farking time.. im working. *sobs sobs*

on valentine's day.. as i watch kids with flowers walking hand in hand.. im in my uniform proceed to work. fuckadey. haish. damn. but meeting Lynn and her lil born baby. yey. so can play with baby first before going to work. i loike~ yey~ so mite be meeting her early.. going to work after tat. sucky day its gonna be. damn.

.....and the shits continues

xx[ valentine-less ]xx

Y 2/13/2005 02:39:00 PM

Nowhere to go.

went to the beach yesterday~ woo.. had fun.. a sunny fun. burned my self to hell. haha and then had a mini BBQ. the whole beach was like a refugee camp. from one end till another all packed with people.. those skimmers. those beachers. those suntanners. all sort of people. woah. it was indeed and cool day!~

nutin much to blog about. did this "berpantun" segment with Husni. wuahahah it was funny. he trying his best to balas every single pantun i gave him. wuahaha. sorrie arh k! i like doing weird stuff.

dunno wether going to Esplanade todae or not. cause feel like going. see how arh. mebe go dome oni arh. but i wanna go sit by the bay la. see how k.

New: PIC OF THE WEEK SEGMENT. Najibbies doin his impersonation of the SAND MAN!~
noting to blog.

*i got a crush on u*

xx[ dua tiga kucing berlari ]xx

Y 2/10/2005 03:33:00 PM

blank.

ps: tis was yesterdae blog entry i forgot to publish. enjoy~

i dunno wad to blog. from where and what. i will try my best k.

actual facts: i am lazy to blog animore. eventhough i have the time..i jus dun have the idea or topic to blog about. how i envy those hu type LONG LONG LONG novel-like books entries. wuahaha.

Monday:
work. work. and more work. well was about to go home after work wen shidada ring me up. she nadia and shiela oreadi got a job. DRINK SELLER down at Esplanade. tis carnival tinggy. and they working there. and then tis Zul Botak KNN.. asked me to go with him. so after much pondering.. with my full uniform...i went. fuck! now i realise how clowny i must have looked. stoopid sia. went there.. as usual tat muthatuna came late. but then not so late arh okie gak arh. then went to treat him sumting to munch. and then met shidada and da rest. hehe. cut long story short...we walked and stayed there till 11pm time for them to log off.. but then delayed and time slowly ticking away... hehe i did sumtin bad. a guy ive been eyeing all day and he noes im eyeing on him.. i wanted to see wether i can earn a number from him. so decided to ask shiela to do tat for me.. wen shiela returned..she said he have a gf.. and then *surprise* he gave me his number lar. no gf summore! woo i loike. hehe. *giggles* then ma dad fetch with lorry. went to have nite supper with nad. as shidada looks very very very tired. so got back home at 3am and slept till 5am and go to work! fuck life.

Tuesday:
noting much. went to work after 2 hours of sleep onli!!! DAAAA!!! then work and work. after work got some Polar for mommy. she wants to eat tat lar. so okie liao. went home. hehe. *yawn* i miss sleeping long long long hours.

mr Husni called me up asking me wether im awake oreadi tis morning.. and i was on my way to work. haha cute lar tis boy. tankew for waiting up till so late to tok to me yesterdae. hope the project ure doing is a success.. hehe *huggies* hehe.

WAH a day spend with ZUL is a day of hell. haha i told him i will include : I WILL NEVER EVER GO OUT WITH ZUL ANIMORE. haha. yeah i wont. i was sleeping and then eh called me asking me Nadia number just now and i told him i dunno. haha he went "otak kau lar bodoh kau tak tau" hahahha and then i realise OH YEAH how can i not noe wen she is my OWN bestfriend. haha stoopid sia. i was sleepy wad... dun blame me. hu ask u call me wen im asleep. haha. zul was extra irritatin wen we both went to meet the three ladies and waited for them. but a lot of ting were shared. we spent hours and hours sitting by the bay and telling and sharing shits amongst us. it was nice.. and COLD. haha. a day well spent with the belo and goblok! haha. siak siak.

going to picnic tomoro with the whole family. suspect kuat gonna have a BBQ. i dunno. im tired but its been a long time since my own family had such events. so tis is gonna be a good one. i hope~mite be going to changi or east coast. mom ask me choose but since i have been lacking of sleep and having a rocker's voice..(sorethroat).. i dun give a damn where we gonna have it. im gonna tan myself out tomoro. so the next time u see me.. im DARKER... wuahahha~ woo. the whole Ahmad fam gonna go take the LORRY down by the beach. wooo. lets hope its gonna be a wonderful chinese new year holiday for me. as it's gonna be somtime wen im gonna have another Public Holiday Off.. so yeah gonna make use of it all! wuahah! *evil grin*

Zai ask me to cheeky's on payday. i wanna go. so tempted.but.. well gotta see.! update to u k soon! i miss all u people oso. dum dee dum... shiela and the rest working so they getting their pay soon oso. later than me by a few days. wah then can go shopping together.. yeeehaaaa. sure gonna be fun fun fun~ hehe. *yawn* im sleepy. but i slept since jus now seh~ eating on some mashed potatoes i bought from 7-11. nyamm nyamm~ i loike.

going to auntie house later to send some chairs. ive been sick for a week. hope i get better soon. tanks for those hu cared. *smiles*

WHAT AGE DO I ACT...

You Are 19 Years Old

19 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

woo correct lar.. teen at heart! haha

xx[ neneku kahwin lagik ]xx

Y 2/08/2005 06:31:00 PM

Cartoonic Life.

*yawn* im still sleepy. im still tired. but here i am up and awake. damn. i jus cudnt get back to sleep. intention to sleep till evening are ruined. dayum! haha. nvm nvm.

A WHOLE LOTTA SHITS HAPPEN SINCE MY LAST UPDATE ... woo!

tot HE wudnt call me. but he did since the last time i wished he called. yes he did. and so many truth blurts out from him. aniwae im not angry with u for wad have happened. im glad u told me the truth. dun tink tat i wud drift away. ure a good friend. someone nice to tok to okie! you tahu tak? i poooonnnn tak tau... wuahahha~ *smiles*


saturday:

went out to sentosa with adi.. and then got up on a monorail. passed siloso beach saw oink..AFIQ.. and amsyah so shouted from above.. haha waved and then they called me up asking me to drop at siloso beach. but i was with adi. din get to meet them till 8.30pm..finally~ now i noe im much more happier with friends. watched musical fountain TWICE. Lame but true. wuahah. the first one with Adi. lame fucking experience. i was yawning away~ and i fell asleep for a minute. and then wen i went with half of the CDS kids.. we had tremendous fun time especially wen the fire zooms up above. haiz. shud have go with them to siloso beach. nvm its over.. then we got back home...it was a tiring and fun day.

got back home and then called HIM.. but then he wanna sleep. suddenli i felt tat i need sumone to tok. and messaged him and he called me..despite feeling sleepy.. so sweet sia~ then he say he gonna call me back.. haha I FELL ASLEEP. wen i woke up todae then i saw his miss calls and his messages. sorrie hor. tired la. haha shudnt have let me wait for u to call back.~ wuaha.

work sucks as normal. i tink i got an exam coming up so yeah. being in hospitals looking at patients walking around like zombies.. and patients walking with all those sticks.. ahha. funny sia. and how people pronounce my name.. nurmalia..numarlia..nuramila..nula..nola..nora.. hahaha fuck tard sia. its NURAMILIA or NURA for heaven sake. wuahah! nvm la. cudnt imagine im gonna go another 30 or more years down with sgh. damn. haha wish me luck.

HE jus called me. he tot it was morning. but it was 1pm oreadi sia. lazy sia he. one day lor sit at home yesterdae summore wanna complain. lazy lazy! suppose to let him listen to local hiphop..he wants too.. jus got off the fone with him aniwae. so yeah~

jus got my pay. a lil bit. but i tink i wanna buy sometin for maself. or pay up my bills. damn lar. i hate bills. i got a friend her bill was being all paid by her divorced dad. so yeah anak manja katakan. if i arh sure i do tat.. use all the advantages.. and leave a big heap pile and pile of bills~ wooo.
todae no plan so stay home. mebe later wanna go cwp to get sushi arh. yesterdae walk with adi he bought for me 4 and 4 for him. but i still wan summore lar.. so mite be going there and also the pasar malam... hehe. weeee i loike loike.so mite be going there arh. so yeah going there soon. mebe tis afternoon. now i wanna go eat my breaklunch.

xx[ poof ]xx

Y 2/06/2005 01:01:00 PM

fishbone issue.

...argh! im sick. yes down with a bad cough and flu. damn! fuck. haiz. and now got a fish bone stuck somewhere down my throat. WUARGH! i jus wanna go to bed! argh argh argh. sedih seh. haiz. wuahaha. takper takper.

met mr arab jus now. at last. after like MONTHS since i hurt him. *sorry*. glad he forgave and forget. went to meet nad to get my shirt. and then i went off with him to chat. nice nice polite guy. asked me out tomoro. so meeting him after work. haha.


argh i feel terrible.

[puking myself out]

Y 2/05/2005 01:35:00 AM

make me go LA LA.

wuarrrrggghhhh!!!! he never call me arh. i mish him ah tonite. why? i oso dunno. message oso never reply. dunno wether he working or not todae. one whole day he never call oso. kaoz~ nvm nvm. be strong. wuahaha siak. kanina sia he. wuahaha.
slept just now. ARGH i cant sms and call out and im freaking pissed. fucktards. i wanna sms so many people sia. fuck sia. smek! so late sia get pay. i wanna pay my bill lor. fuck. fuck. ooo i like the word fuck. hehe.

got home straight. YES. haha no dome todae. i was freaking tired. my back hurts. i was cringing in pain so i made my way home. now i am sleepy again. i wanna go sleep. but later. hehe. gonna pack my bag with my stuff i wanna put in my locker. can i put cute guys in it? can i put nadia in it.. can i put all my serangkais in it? so wen i tired i can pull them out and hug them? hehe.

im S L E E P Y. yes i am.

zzzzz im a good sleeper. bad lover. wuahaha. got such ting? haha. i mish him la. where is he sia. fucktard lar tat boy. *sigh*

xx[ Im ur french maid ]xx

Y 2/02/2005 01:04:00 AM