i fantasize you

weekend was a blast.

went HRC with Zai LuLu Sarina DD Haikel and Maz.

dancefloor was pack and fite broke out.

DD flirted twice. i flirted 4 times. wuaha.

Haikel labelled as "HENSEM" by BAPOKS. aww their dream guy~ haa.

went Mustafa Centre with Kel DD and DD's friends.

take the cab home at 6am.

Tok a while on the way home with Kel.

then reach bed. sleep.

meet Monster at 1400hours the nex morn.

spent the whole day with him.

i *heart* him to bits.

end the day with a smile.

-end- *smiles*

Y 11/28/2005 01:43:00 AM

nuro *hearts* ddo


tis entry for today 24.11.2005 will be all on my monster. a tribute to DD-o.

first up i realise wen im sleeping and sumbodi disturb me i tend to UGLILY react. immediate. haa.
im sorry:
for shoutin at you. for scolding you. for calling you names. for cheating on you. for lying to you. for not believing in you. for doubting you.
Thank You:
for loving me everyday. for making me feel special every minute. for calling me to wake me up to work. for going to JB wen i run low of row-cokes. for waiting for me eventhough im an hour late. for believing in me. for giving me 2 chance. for still loving me.

i love him. he noes that. hee. wee.

so i came back home from work. saw mom greeting me at the DOOR. haa. then reach home on the aircon. then change. shower. then sit in front of the pc. wanted to call Monster but was lazy then suddenly he call..
DD-o: Asal tak kol?
Nuro: nak kol abeh u dah kol *grinz padahal padahal*
DD-o: okie.. go sleep k. takmo main computer animore. go sleep.
Nuro: okie. bye bye

...continues chatting on msn. WUAHAHA. haiz. haa!

i miss him. i miss him. argh i miss his stoopidity and irritatingness! haaa.

-end-

Y 11/24/2005 04:50:00 PM

Dial

im suppose to be getting ready for work. but i got no mood. cause Mr Mp3 is not here with me. tanks to Feruz. babi. haa nvm lar. still hafta to go to work wad rite. glad todae Zai working with me. at least got someone to go and bother in the middle of the nite. argh FUCK i got a long journey to work sia! chill chill.

Monster called me. he sounds as if he was sleeping. then i was sooo enthusiastically telling him about the show 9/11 part Two. but he never respond. haa. then i haf to shout to get him awake. argh i have a cute bf sia. days goes by and i miss u more. yey cant wait for Saturdae. Monster wanna bring me out. weee. i cant wait sia. so long never go out with him... muax. todae Monster and Dinosaur both working nite shift. wee.

i wonder how nis is doing. can she speak cantonese now? hmmx. haa.

getting my HP soon! weee.

i cant wait for Saturday. ARGH.

-end-

Y 11/23/2005 06:17:00 PM

i watched 9/11 shown on NG(national geographic)

i cried to monster. he laughed.

unfair of people to die..innocent people. sigh.

i switch off the teebee cause i was too afraid and sad to see somemore.

sigh sigh.

im sleepy. nites! da!

-end-

Y 11/23/2005 03:03:00 AM

finally the day is here. the last day with Miss Froggie herself. eh really i jus realise ur face like frog sia. haa! oops.

Nis:
its hard to swallow every reality that's happening. it's hard to understand on the unfairness of life. days by days pass by and i grew closer to u. all those outings... all those chillings... all those slackings.. and suddenly u gotta go. wen i tot that im gonna fuck all the past behind and start tings new with u.. u gotta tell me this. its sad but wad can we do.. ure going aniwae.
Nis.. no matter wad.. i realli appreciate wadever u did. the rokoks. the time. the laffter. the friendshipt. i love u a lot. remember we once said Serangkai Part Two. haa. tings definitely gonna be different without u.East Coast wad the day i felt so down. haiz. our last outing. our last laffter on an outing. haiz. i swear there's many tings for me to say.. but tis much is wad i can type. im gonna miss u .. A LOT. wen u get tired of HK.. and wen u decide to come back.. remember CDS .. there will always be a place for u. u mean a lot to us. to everyone of us. *sigh* where u will always stay.. were u will always belong.. Civic Dome Squad. *hearts*
im gonna miss u my serangkai.. my gf.. my sweet lady.. my friend.

its hard. to believe she's leaving us..for good. but promise us u wont forget everyone of us. *heart* u baby girl.

so i went to work. i saw so many irritatin people. irritatin cars. irritatin children. irritatin ringtones. irritatin mrt. everyting irritate me todae. bah~ but i miss my monster. i swear i do. haiz.
im prolly the worst gf ever. hee.

i wanna go Disneyland.

i love u nis. have a safe journey. if u hate HK. shoot everyone and come back to us. *smiles*
no matter how far u are separated from us.. there's always the heart. that's where each of us belong in each other's heart. loves!

-end-

Y 11/20/2005 05:22:00 PM

chaos

East Coast Park Craze. Event: Beaching & Bitching.



on our way.



still on our way.



wad da similarity in all pics. SAMAD



SAMAD wen he dun get marry in years to come.



where everyone needs each each other.



so we went to ECP. got others arh tat was not included in the pic. either nisak din take them or their face not worth to be taken. muahah. indeed it was one of the fun day outing with CDS kids (some). haa. *heart* u guys to dear.
i saw CUTE guy in the BUS on the way home. ahhhh *melts* i love cute guys. haiz. haa.

shouldnt go on about love and etc etc. the shida razil and zul news shud be a shh shh. i got no intention to intefere animore and tell all of u anitin! hee. *smiles* i will always pray for her.

i dun feel like blogging. shit.

Nis can u dun go? *sobs*
*hugs tite tite*

-end-

Y 11/18/2005 12:13:00 AM

i din go to the vet.
i sleep late yesterday.
i woke up at 3.30pm.
my bf sucks he make me cry.
i had fish head curry for dinner.
the nasi lemak boy is cute.
im late to meet my bf at dome.
i wan engage QD.
im sorry cat for not bringing u to the vet.

-end-

Y 11/15/2005 06:35:00 PM

i love Fuad Rahman. da real one k. not the wanna-be. haa. *wink*

i finish my 3 nites. minus one so 2 nites. and im on my off day! wee. i like. so tired. i dunno why ive been so letargic this past few days.. hmm.

departures are never easy. indeed. first Nisak gonna leave us. then now a friend that i've been relying on. it hurts but not sad. noting to be sad about. in the end they still gotta leave. sigh. wadever it is.. a remembrance and memories will always stay. *muaks* u both kids~ loves~

so he told me that he felt that everytin is not rite. i wish i cud jus go there in front of him and give him a BIG FUCKING TITE SLAP. haa. he said ive not loved him as much as i did before. and ive been ignoring him all tis while. haa. BF needs attention too! argh. but i still love him. he's doing everytin now to see me smile.every minute pass by and i tink of him. every second pass by and i care for him. every day pass by and i miss him. hee. i *heart* u many many sia!
he will always be my "Fuad Rahman" wuaha.

to Razil : im sorry that i told u everytin but u seem so lost. im glad u were strong to forgive her. she is confused and im glad u took it in an orderly manner. ure funny wen u PANIC. u sound like ustaz. haa. im happy for both of u.

to Shidada: my look-like-a-boy sweet. u made ur choice then u change it again and made the final choice. he's good to all of us. jus tat remember NEVER run away from ur problems. he can listen. he told me that. all u gotta do is share. he loves u. i can see that after yesterday but as much as he nurture u.. u gotta nurture him to be part of ur life too.
im happy as long ure happy. like i told u.. nurara will always be there for Shidada. same goes to Nadz. Pharz. Nis. everyone k. muax. hope ure happy!

i cant wait to meet monster. we gonna send Cik Miah cat to the vet tomoro! wee. its VET DAY. woot woot. hee. mebe catch Exorcism of Emily Rose? mebe? but i dun wanna go with Monster. he is more timid then me! he threw pop corns at me! haiz. pening. wuaha.

-end-

i heart u.
nadz.
pharz.
niz.
shidaz.
nuraz.
ddz.
...wee

Y 11/14/2005 11:34:00 PM

so she made her choice. was shocking to see the result that fast just now but okie lar. as najib says @ the staircase.. as long she's happy.. we're happy. *smiles* let the new chapter unfold.

so i got back from nite shift. slept for like 3 hours and then Monster called me. accidentally shouted at him cause i was really really grouchy wen i wake up. so bla bla then met him at woodlands mrt to go Taufik's girl open house. i wore pink! pharz called me a piglet. she look like some minah malaysia who haf a singaporean bf. haa. no hard feelings tho. went there. the house was awesome. food was great. they have Monster's favourite animals. CATS. argh. 4 summore!~ so u can imagine i was chucked at one corner while Monster played with the cats. and then here comes the TROUBLE.

Karaoke. ARGH. why! why have u gotta show him the mic. whyyyyy! haa. so he duet with Dada a song and two. and the funny part the RUffegde song. haa. he made me so happy and i was cringing in pain as he sings. but seriously he can sing.. at least lar.. hmm interesting! haa. i haf a sing-able bf. nyahaha!

aniwae fun gotta end. sad cant go on with the kids to more houses. me and monster got work in the nite. yeah. so went back. and now gotta go get ready to go work. hee. i hate work. why have to work!

so to Shidada. hope ure happy. wadever happens ur gf's will still be there for u...as always.

loves!

-end-

Y 11/13/2005 06:27:00 PM

maybe pharz was rite. maybe we shudnt be so judgemental on sumone's else love life.
but certain tings she is wrong. well i tink so.. aniwae we got our own say..

lets take dada love life. she is utterly confuse. *sorry dada* i as a bestfriend, it hurts to see she coming up to me telling me why tis why tat why tings happen like tis. etc etc. and being a bestfriend i wudnt jus wanna say "never mind la never mind la" of course i wudnt wanna budge into her relationship. i wudnt care less since i got my own probs with my own soon to be wife beater if he dun change! haa. but wen u get sumbodi hu is confuse and smoke endlessly now and seem so lost wads the worst u can do. u can pat her back u can encourage her but she will still be confuse.
after the tok i had with her.. i knew she woke up. i knew she finally realise she was loving razil in a lie. she never loved razil. she said she does in hoping that her feelings developed twice as fast. razil is a rebounder. a get away from zul. sometin she cling on so that she wont fall flat wen she broke up. we were there to catch her but she fell half way. she knows deep down it was zul that made her happy. it sumhow make her wake up and allow her to make her choice. she wudnt be tinking of zul if she loves razil rite? girls and ex's true they tend to remember the memories but if razil wud have shower her twice as much love.. wudnt shida be happy? why is she smoking so endlessly with us and do notin but whine?
wadever it is she's making her choice. i hope she made the rite one. both are equally good to me tho~


bout Mamat and Nad. its not about being a fortune teller. its not about being nosy about their relationship. its already clear cut that Mamat was using her. i bet Nad wud say the same now since she moved on. loving her too much was wad make me wanna protect her but sumhow love can make two friends becames enemy and shits happen and i backed off. and now wad happen? it hurts to see wen ur own bestfren gets notin in the end and get left behind. its all about prevention and trying ur luck he or she listens.
sometimes as a friend u gotta prevent or jus look on for certain relationship.

but fuck wadever it is.. we will still be there for one another. jus like u guys were there wen i was hurt by dd. everytin happens for a reason.. yeah i was stupid to go back to him despite of all the warnings and everyone asking me to leave him.. but in the end it comes to only one.. we gotta make our decision. jus like others.. we can tell dada who is the rite guy bla bla bla in the end its her choice we dun make her choice of love.. same goes to nad or farz or niz or even izza or the rest. or even me.

wadever it is.. love is not sumtin u rush into. dun get hurt in love but get love and its whole package. *smiles*

fuck im working tonite.

-end-

Y 11/12/2005 02:01:00 PM

i feel so much guilt. but i dunno wad shud be guilty of. its true wen u start to tink everytin's in place then another ting comes up. wen i and love starts to settle ting then a family issue comes up. its never ending. but fcuk im not gonna blog about how lame life is.. how unfair life is.. i just gonna look at tings in a different angle. hmmm~

so i slept early. tanks to mak for feeding me the medicine early. i feel soo drowsy and now i noe wad they really mean by DO NOT TAKE THE MEDICINE DURING WORK. haa. i slept for almost the day away. i wake up and have my dinner and check my mails and then went back to sleep. i slept and slept and slept. argh its worst then taking sleeping pills.

so im on mc. ive been sick for 5 days oreadi. why seh. haiya. if only my life was like last time. where i dun have to work. on the other hand i get money so yeah disadvantages and advantages. but i love my work but fall sick frequently now lar. maybe i need vitamins oreadi arh.

so why am i blogging all tis non-important shit? i dunno.

i miss him so much. he is now working nite shift everyday and the only time i can see him is his day off. its gonna be different. lesser of his face and jokes and more of fone calls and missing each other. hee.

so mite be going to dome. i dunno. argh. argh. im sick.

-end-

Y 11/11/2005 02:55:00 PM

Life is indeed fair in an unfair way. go figure it out *winks*

anyways.. i spent the whole day @ JB with monster. so yeah we did LOTSA of walking here and there and a bit of arguements.. not me and him but with some mat malaysia mana.. so yeah long story short we had the whole day to ourself.
then we went to Dome and blah blah.. all went home.

so here's the most eventful ting happen.

We actually talked! yes. it felt nice. he hears me. and i listened to him. and we both gave opinions. we did talk after 5 months. we reflected. we did lotsa deep tinking together. and its been quite some time since i felt so close to him. since i felt i was his real love. it took 5 months and here we are feeling like we jus got to noe each other.
maybe tings did happen for a reason. mebe the incident did really happen for a reason. a sudden wake up call for both of us. a wake up call to show that we really need EACH OTHER to make tings happen. and we need each other to go thru tis life together. for the first time he held my hand and said he gonna fulfil every single wish he made to me on our first day we got together. he said he gonna stoop low and throw all his ego if tat wad it takes for us to be happy.
he made me tell him our love story. from the first time he asked for my number till i 'cept to be his lady. all i did was tok and tok and tok. hee~!
it felt.. nice. i wish tat nite din have to end.
for the first time..after 5 months of suffering.. of tears.. of fites.. i finally feel true love.
*Smiles* a day tat both of us never will forget.

i will always be his baby dinosaur and he's my mr monster. *wink*

as i lay in bed.. i wish and pray that tis gonna last for eternity. wen i lay in ur arms jus now all i can tink of is being happy and there for u. fuck all the past. fuck all the shit we went thru. fuck all those nites we fought. we gonna be happy. all it takes is jus a simple understanding and trust.
now i noe wad true love really meant.
i love u DD.

i shall sleep with a smile. tee hee!

ps: fuck my archives disappeared. anione noe how to recover them?

-end-

Y 11/09/2005 05:20:00 AM

conference never mean so meaningless with Shidada & Taufik.

breast.. butts.. shaven.. trimmed? oh god its so meaningless.~

tis blog is gonna be tribute to our little auntie : Nis.

i barely noe u. the first time i noe u and saw u was at cineleisure. haa. remember? then from tat day we went out and start to lepak. now ure leaving.. how hard can tat be? we went thru shits and have our fites and arguements. now ure leaving.. i wanna take tis opportunity tat i truly appreciate all tings uve been given me and all ur support. ur rokoks haa!!!! im gonna miss ur lafter. ur nonsense. ur smile.
wen u leave.. and enter tat door.. remember to turn back and look.. tat WE will stand there and look at u. noe that ure friends are there to watch u leave and be there to welcome u home.. i love u k. dun leave with a heavy heart jus noe tat no matter wherever u go.. u will always be part of us!! hee.. *heart* u many many froggie!

it hard to depart . especially sumbodi tat have always been there for us and with us. but we will always be reunited again. till then dak dak CDS still cares for u! and gonna miss u...

-end-

Y 11/08/2005 03:36:00 AM

Nadz:
"eh bodoh, kluar ngan aku!!" eh kau, kluar ngan aku!!!

Tashaa:
shoudnt he ask her out?

Samad BboyFreak:
when sey?

Zulee:
Sms? Fone? Letters? Best is SMS..

haa.. stoopid. weird eh? ask guys out? shudnt it be guys ask girls out? dah terbalik arh dunia!

aniwae yesterdae spent time with CDS kiddos. taufik rosakkan motor Jo. haa JOHARI was there! its been months ive lost contact with hym. and he came over and saw me. ended up toking and slacking together. aww!

monster was so sweet yesterdae. we made a promise in front of two hard witness. we promised not to repeat wad we have done in the past. we promise to change and promise tat despite shits we will stick thru each other. he been calling and calling and i still zzz-ing. tired mah. still sick and fever but meeting him todae. i still miss him! haa.

i miss nad and farz kentot oso!

so yeah.. cant wait to jalan raya.

i wan to die arh. my chest pain. stoopid sia.

-end-

Y 11/07/2005 03:52:00 PM

save the rainforest. give blood. haa. no connection sia but i saw tis advert in one of the website. blood& rainforest???

Y 11/06/2005 06:12:00 PM

sometin ive copyrighted from a friend's blog. so shit ive decided to do it oso.

7 Things That Scares Me

• shiela's hair in the morning
• nadz barney teeth
• falling in love
• cockroaches
• i cant tink of anitin
• seriously noting
• so jus 4 tat scares me.

7 Things That I Loves The Most

• Mom
• Shidada
• Nadz
• Farz
• Niz
• DD M.P (monster)
• make up!!!!

7 Important Things In My Room

• Pooh bear by *him*
• computer
• my make up bag
• hp & its charger
• photos
• my bed arh!!!

so yeah i got lazy to continue. haa. tings were ruff. all those begs. all those tears. ive been thru tis before.. i jus feel like ive seen this scene before. it happens many times. u jus keep on begging and crying and then wen we end up together like last time it happens again. i jus need reassurance.. i wont be the way i am if isnt cause of u. seriously.

i miss my hp. argh. *sobs*

you fucking disappoint me

-end-

Y 11/06/2005 11:17:00 AM

back to square one.

yeah i do miss u so bad now. i jus hope those tings dun happen. yes i wish u were still with me but then again.. all those sad tots.. the times u keep on hurting me. despite all ur promises. the times u really bring me down so low. those tears i shed for u meant noting. those strength i had in u means noting. those sacrifices i made for u it meant noting. all those days we spent together.. means shitless. all i wanna do is make tings better.. it got wrong but why do u have to hurt me like tat. i felt so scared around u. and im suppose to be loving u. haiz.

i will try to move on. with all the aches.. with all the scars.. with all the bruises.. everytin.
i will try.. despite having to tink of u.. i so love u seh. why seh? all ur promises.

every tears i shed yesterdae was tears of regrets.. sadness.. and guilt but.. why must hurt me yesterdae. for 5 months i let u beat the hell outta me. i let u bring me down. yet i brought u food. i gave u my love. i stood by u wen u were alone. i sacrifice my time. i accompanied u in the hospital.. and tis is wad happens of all the 4 months shits i given. its worthless.

nvm.i learned. i got stronger. if i can be so strong to be with u i can be strong with anitin.
i love u still but im sorry tings turn out the way both of us never tot of.
sorry to tok about marriage with u. to tok about future plans with you. now we gotta slowly erase tat. it hurts. haiz. i *heart* u stil ..

tanks to people who listened.

-end-

Y 11/05/2005 01:28:00 PM

it went down the drain. the promises. the words. the love. everyting...

i cried so hard. i did sumtin wrong. but why again the one hurt is me?

i crumble. i cried. i screamed. you kept on going.

please let all tis ting ends im hurt. *cries*

Y 11/05/2005 02:58:00 AM

Selamat Hari Raya

Y 11/02/2005 09:32:00 PM

so my blog got no song oreadi. so if u wan song please sing to urself while surfing my blog k.
*singing to Salt N Peppa* ol' skool sheet. wuaha.

@ last im off. im tired but jus feel like blogging. so Zai made me take the train when i jus feel like taking the bus. sucky. so yeah i took the train and i woke up jus in time wen it reached Marsiling. tank god. haa.

so meeting mom later to go get some shits. then mebe go and get a haircut @ Toni&Guy. waiting for the people to call back. i badly need a haircut. im bored with my straight hair. sucky.

so im stuck with Life In Mono by Mono. i find the song so relaxing. hee. weird but true.. mebe i shud start listening to Bjork?~ argh.

to YOU:
you keep calling me. you keep asking me advices but u listen to none. then wen trouble happens you search for me. you cant even wanna listen instead u wanna fucking complain? wad u take me for? a place to come wen ur gf doesnt call u. and EVERYTIME u keep repeating the same ol' shit to me. i had enuff k. enuff of ur crap of wanting to part with her la. of wanting to not have a gf. cmmon la get a life. for once jus admit that YOU ARE A FOOL. so stop saying ure stupid for loving her. stop sayin u wanna break up with her. cause ive heard it for like THOUSANDS of time but still you keep crumbling back to her feet wen she call u up. so wen u finally wake up from it then u can call me again. let me hear some good news not whines. please. wake up!

so im prolly going to sleep.

gonna clean my house and then gonna go geylang. woo at last im going geylang. sucks.

aniwae nice to noe u "BOMB" aka Firdaus. i was laffin to myself wen u were complaining to me about shiela. i told you she is a freak. haa. tanks for having a chat with me. *smiles* it was nice getting to noe u. =)

so yeah i love u monsta!~ hee.

-end-

Y 11/02/2005 09:12:00 AM

happy deepavali to all my indian friends.. do i have one? hmm Najibbo accountable? hee. joking hor! no joke no fun no baker shop no bun! dope!~

so wen is Halloween. was it yesterdae? or todae.. hmmx was i fooled again. two of my colleagues said its todae and they were freaking doing the Halloween dance which scared the wits outta me early in the morning at 3.15am~ so yeah. wen issit?

im sleepy. monsta mite be going home today. dunno. cudnt wait with him i was tired. soo badly need to reach home. hee. sowie. i mish him badly.

slept in the bus. i was alone. the ONE and ONLY passenger. strange but true k! so i slept and slept and slept then i reach woodlands. then i saw SO many indian people in costumes. they look nice and it reminds me of Raya. ITS COMING. argh. i have prepared shitless.

is there even October fool?! Raymie did the October Fool on me. lame sia. stoopid sia. haa.

so friends telling me their baju raya kaler. blue la. brown la. black la. white la. everything la. haa. and my kaler? green can? uniform SGH. dope~!

so i miss my gf's. been 3 days since i saw their dopey face. i miss nisak oso sia. i miss izza irritatin face oso. haa. dunno why sia. fcuk. its the end la. if sumone miss izza it means dah rabak sia.

To all:
Nura ingin menyusun 456 jari untuk memohon maaf zahir batin. harap segala dosa dan salah silap Nura dimaafkan. Kalau terkasar bahasa harap di maafkan. Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir Dan Batin.

translate : Nura Wish Arrange 456 Fingers For Forgiveness. Hope Every Sins And Mistakes Nura Forgiveable. If ROugh Language Hope Forgive. Safety Hari Raya Sorry "Zahir And Batin"
haa bodoh sia nura~!

To Monsta:
Nura mintak maaf every single shits ive been puttin on u. i love u. Selamat Hari Raya k my biggie monsta. *rarr rarr* can i have a pet kitten for christmas?~

Y 11/01/2005 10:43:00 AM