toothache. *sobs* =(


im very happy. i din went berserk wen ayangz called me.
he said he was very sorry.
i understand. i wish i can tell u..
I UNDERSTAND oreadi.
im not the ol' selfish girl u knew back in 2005.
so please stop apologizing oreadi.
i forgive u.
happily ever after. hee

i made up my day by going out to Civics with shiela.
met Eddy. Fadli and their soccer mates.
tok.. erm..some sort like tat ahh.. then drank Milo.
then pee. then puffy puff puff.
then went home.
i miss him badly.. he knows that.
cant wait to see him again.
*yey*

to Roslee.
im sorry i lied. but i confessed oreadi.
i noe ure hurt. i noe u avoiding me.
im sorry. eventho ur smses hurts but i understand.
i din mean to lie to u.
i cud be a friend. DDie is sumone i wanna be with.
sorrie i din tell u tat day at work.
im realli realli sorrie.
im realli sorrie yesterday u waited for me at work before u went home.
im sorrie. IM SORRIE seh..serious seh!
argh. dumb. haiz.

Mr Rasidy. i love you.

Y 5/29/2006 02:07:00 AM

Happy 1 year to Nad and Mat.
may ur relationship grow and prevail.
muaks.
=)

ok. todae sucks okie!
rain. then suppose to meet ayangz.
skali overshot tido sia.
hujan sedap perrrrr... kanasai.
then he oso never kol. i tink he sleeping.
unless he's out with another girl.
hmmmm.

but okie la. aniwae im tired too. so nvm la.
lagi lagi ngah ujan. wah.
i remembered wad to blog about until 2 second ago.
i totally forgot every single ting.
haiya.

so excited seeing people turning one year.
seeing people holding on to their relationship.
hmm. wad will it be like for me.?
hee. shall wait and see. few more days.

ok la. mebe going to civic with shiela and gang.
dunno ah. i got toothache.
got mood then go.
no mood dun go.

k bye.

Y 5/28/2006 04:37:00 PM

i deleted my previous entry.
mood : so depress i can kill myself jus by biting on my wrist.
tats was before.
now i feel so.. happy. yey -_-''.



hee i made that.
HE CALLED. yey. *jumps around together and joyously with fats and breast*
finally. and i cried. okie it sounds funny to see a big fat (but sweet and cute and semi pretty) girl crying... but TOUCHING OKIE. damn u people.

other half was like:
"dah ayang takmo nangis..dah shh shh k"
and i was like:
"BOOOHOO BOOHOO *sob sob* sniff sniff cough."
bullshit sia.

nvm la. over is over. meeting him early tomoro.
he wanna haf b'fast with me.
we love food. we love food. ahh.
then settling my bills everything.

i changed my skin...again after SOOO LONG.
i just want it to be bright. dull . simple and mundane.
....jus like me.
ahh a bliss.

other half. i miss u la. i deleted OUR blog cus.. dah ber-abuk siak.
i tink spider webs dah form pon..
hee. malas peh pasal...

eh i realise i dun have friends.
pathetic eh?
but i dun feel desperate to have one.
yes of course i got no one to tok to about tings besides other half.
HOW MANY TINGS can i actualli tok to him about?
but then again.. ive yet to feel so alone.
im naive la. tat's why its hard for me to get real true friends.
sometimes i see zai having two good girl friends.. its sad..
but after wad i went thru with friends..for friends.. those backstabbing.
those childish act..
i better be off alone.
i got my colleagues to take my mind off @ work. *smiles*
and i got other half. *hearts*

i kinda miss shida. cause wenever i listen to tamia song it reminds me of her.
haa. bleurgh.

a few more days. we turn 1..a big 1~


i love u ayangz.

Y 5/25/2006 01:37:00 AM

sales sales sales EVERYWHERE.
argh. im so going nutz. hee.

the past two days were the best day i ever had.
spent every single moment with my ayang.
we laughed so hard at stupid stuffs.
we shared a lot of shits.
we talked about everything.
tank u ayang.

yesterday he bought me to watch Over The Hedge.
ARHHHH cute sial.
then @ mini toons got the plushies.
but ayang dun allow me to buy.
dia takot jadi cam winnie the pooh. haa. tak terjaga in the end.
sowie.

we din make it to Finals but the guys did.
kita din wanna go Finals cause nak concentrate on Dikir Puteri.
so the guys group went.
wah sumer handal handal sia.
haa... good luck.

okie suppose to meet ayang todae.
but he havent call yet.

okie im out.

i want to watch Scary Movie 4. so late seh.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/23/2006 11:19:00 AM

ok. im tired.
realli damn tired.
4 nights. in between trip to dikir.
ahh im so exhausted.

ayangz came over to my work just now.
to pass me some cash. aww god i miss that boy.
6 days straight tau tak jumpa. BREAK RECORD seh.
kencang.
it was a quickie ah. he kissed my cheeks and off to work again..
haiyah.. i mish hugging u la dumb.
nvm meeting him todae.

wah cannot wait pay day sia.
i need to get that bag from P.O.A zila was toking about.
big bags turn me on..
AYANG bila nak kasi alik my bag bag??!! hmmmm!
and a slipper or shoe. ahh.

had breakfast with zai.
the uncle mata JULING sia.
cannot make out he's actualli looking at who.
funny seh. then Zai's bestfriend came.
WUAHAHA.
k dah diam.

ive been playing Kevin's song.. Never Wanna Make You Cry.
over and over and over and over again.
i dunno la.. so fun la tat song.
makes me so clubbish.
haiya.

me: "ayang nak gi clubbing tis saturday?"
him: "lah...next sat k.. nex time kita gi k?"

the last time he said the word NEXT time was a year ago.
tak pegi pegi seh.
bley tahan si DDie peh nex sat. dah brape banyak saturday lepas!
hmmph! haa

okey ah nak tido.
nari petang ader dikir.
last two days seh! kanasai tol ah.

sorrie to hear about Abang Joe accident.
hope he recover soon.
sorry that u cant play for the semi's!
we will be praying for you.

im out.

numero uno

Y 5/19/2006 11:05:00 AM

still yet to get the DKNY perfume.
i love it.
ayang i nak tu leh? pls?
will get it.. i noe i will. hee.
or sumtin by Anna-Sui?
love those graphics. damn.

ayang woke me up. i slept from yesterdae till todae.
woke up at 4pm wen he called me.
ahh. i was realli tired. i wish i cud just go back to sleep.
i tink i will fall asleep tonite at work.
hee.

todae cant go dikir cause got to go work.
ayang made up his mind. he doesnt wanna play for the semi's.
he's too tired. too worked up.
sigh. now cannot see him perform up there.
but he will come and support me la.
muaks.

so many things i want from so little money.
i wan to rebond my hair.
i wan to colour it purple.
i wan new tee-shirts with stupid graphics.
i wan more hand accesories.
i wan weird looking pants.
i wan my perfume.
i wan a new hp. nokia. not motorola.
i wan to go KL.
i wan to go clubbing.
i wan to eat and eat and eat.
i wan to go sentosa again.
i wan a digicam.

every ting!!!! arghhhhhhh!!!!! fuck.

wen will it ever end!!! fuckadey.

eh i love u ddie. hee.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/15/2006 06:21:00 PM

wads ddie i/c number.
argh. been tinking bout it for the past hour.
dammit i hate it wen u jus wanna forget it but its still stuck in ur head.

ive been doing morning shift 5 days straight. back to back.
so tomoro im nite and im freakishly happy.
im having a toothache. and im really tired.

okie. went to dikir tadi.
OKIE AH dis time best ah sia.. got liriks and steps oreadi la.
dah bagus tu.
Harapan and Keris sumer dah siap.
tinggal BaLQis je.. maklumla kita kan lone ranger. hee.


ayang bought me a pink V3. i dun like it. sucks.
but haa... mite change it.. mebe...

okie dah penat. baaboosh. ayang pon dah koling koling.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/15/2006 01:44:00 AM

i wanna hug my bf and never let go.
so tite that he will struggle to be free.
sigh.
its so hard to keep up with US.
i miss him so much. we just met aniwae but..
todae i finally realised..

1) he followed wadever i say.
2) i was the one making the ALL the decisions.
3) he worked like HELL just to take me out everyweek.
4) he sacrificed his money just to get me the HP i want.
5) he tried so hard to stay awake eventhough he's sleepy to meet me.

ahh how can i be so selfish. hee. but he forgiven me. but he said he's not gonna say a word..
cause he love me.
how sweet can a bf be.
ahh. bliss.

first the HP then now the chocolates. ahh.
so went to Paya Lebar after work to surprise Ayang. cause he's there for an interview.
then he tot i went home. and decided to meet up at Dikir.
but i was on the way to meet him.
he's been craving for Murtabak so otw i got him his fave.
then he was sitting there sms-ing me saying he wish i was there.
then *POP* i was there.
i wish i cud take a pic of his smile. the biggest smile ever.
gave him the murtabak.
and i will always remember his words:
"you will be the one and only thing i ever wanted to make me complete"
in malay la.
eh boy i lop lu la!

okie enuff of him.
Dikir SUCKS ok. Harapan and Keris started song and ragam.
WE? zero. no songs yet.
how la. how la. how la.?! stress seh.
tomoro till comp day will be everyday training.
i changed my schedule oreadi. so okie la.

i wanna go sentosa. but ayang say waste time and money.
there too expensive with little tings to do.

yey ayang getting me the Mega Perdana Saringan VCD.
he be collecting it on 14/5.
cant wait to watch.

Saturdae family picnic at ECP.
everybody will be there.
Ayang. family. Fadli. everyone.
prays it goes well.

ok i need sleep ah.

Ya allah ya tuhanku..
Jauhilah segala masalah...segala bencana... segala kesusahan daripada ibuku. ayahku. adik ku. sedara-mara ku. kawan-kawanku. dan juga rasidy.
lindungi la mereka.
Amin.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/10/2006 12:38:00 AM

finally he called. saying sorry over and over again.
it hurts. yes. but he explained about his disappearance.
apparently he needs time alone. away from everytin.
i understand. i have to.
but its all clear now.. he's back to his ol' self.
im sorry if i wasnt so understanding. k?

hee. so he came to woodlands to meet me.
by surprise... it feels so long tat i last seen him.
but actually its only two days. bah~
so he asked me to get ready.
we went to catch WHEN A STRANGER CALLS.
not scary but i was so scared of the suspends.
i covered my face with the popcorn bag.
dumb sia.
farz and doink was watching it too.
ok la not bad la the show.

i had a korean meal just now.
ahhh satisfying.

we went to sit around and we tok about marriage.
haa. takder topic lain sia.
then shiela and fadli came along.
they have tis same BRAZIL tee. so cool.
but i and ddie find its not a good idea to wear a similar tee.
wadever la.
in the end bual sal marriage oso. election. sex. everyting.
wuaha crazy sial.

ELECTION. kiwak dah macam singapore idol siol.
only got aged people around.
kns.
but im not familiar with all tis stuff so i heck care.

tomoro meeting ddie again.
and i got dikir practise oso.
ahhh dah malas gitu.
but semi's coming so must go.
yipaaa..

see ya.

im happy...finally.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/08/2006 02:02:00 AM

hee..finally i became a singapore citizen.
went to apply for it yesterday.
so just waiting for the letter to come and collect my ic.
woo. best.

yesterdae went to ICA building with mak and shiela.
ddie came later.
tanks for paying for my ic. hee. lop u.

then we finish everytin..we went to town.
cause mak wanna eat some indonesian cuisine.
ddie treated us all.
then walk around .. like 3 hours for shiela stuff.
sick.

then met Fadli @ 1800 at Plaza Singapura.
DDie wanted to go there. every body followed.
i fell in the cab. not outside or beside..BUT INSIDE.
haa. cause the gap between the front and back seats were big. so terjatuh dalam.
dun ask me how and why it happened. it just did.
haa. fucktard.

at Plaza Singapura..DDie bought me a V3. i was so happy.
but the problem is ..he bought the PINK one.
ahhh sick. but new hp..wadda hell.. so yea.
then all of us went to Yishun..as Fadli meddle with my fone..
i feel so bad for DDie as he din get his hp but got it for me...
i jus wish i can buy him a fone too..

so all of us to Yishun..surveyed Mak hp lak..
DDie buying mak a hp for mother's day gift.
so yeah we got her a fone tat she truly like.
keep meddling with the fone whole day.
then all of us went to eat dinner.
DDie treat again. haa. kesian.

then he paid for the cab fare home.
mak went home.. and we went to sit under the void deck.
me shiela fadli and ddie.
ddie was irritatin.. toking about gay sex with fadli.
to Fadli:
i hope u understand he likes to joke.
he crazy la k. hope u dun mind.
haa.

okay la todae working. so i wan to go back to rest.
tired sia.

to Nadia:
hey anitin jus msg me la.. if u wanna meet up k *wink*

argh nex week dikir training everyday sial.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/04/2006 12:01:00 PM

&(@#$^#$&#@*)#$*(^@~~!!!!!!
mom woke me up @ 7am..
cause i need to get my singapore citizenship over and done with.
saper yang tau .. bagus.. saper yang tak tau.. action tau k~

so i din keep my promise of not meeting him on Tuesdae.
we both met...again. haa.
he said he missed me.
so ya.. pukol 9.30am he called me up asking me to meet up.
PAGI TAU!! wads wrong with u people?!!!!
there 12pm..1pm. yet they have to do it in the AM...
sial tol. but sayang nye pasal aper leh buat.

so he asked me to reach M.P by 11 cause nak gi Parkway Parade.
i keep reminding him NOT TO FALL ASLEEP again... so he went yeah yeah yeah.
then he say take the cab..
so i took the cab. and IN THE CAB i called him. he's still awake.
15 mins later i called him wen i wanna reached HE'S ASLEEP!
and he's not answering.
so i have to make the cabby wait and i went up. tis time im not gonna wait downstair
and keep on calling.
its knocking the door time.
i went up and i swear my blood boils like mad. KETOK PEH KETOK.
at last dia bangun.
kanina!
i shouted at him so bad. he kept quiet. said sorry and i shout at him from his house
all the way to the cabby.
gua bingit.
then he paid the cabby and then i feel bad.
haa. cause he's working abeh baru balik then tak dapat tido.
TAPI AKU NGAH TIDO DIA YANG NAK JUMPA SANGAT!
hee...
sayang ddie.

so blah blah. nari jumpa lagik cause wanna go bring mommy to eat.
he need to get mommy her hp for mom day.
then he said mebe he get me one too..
PRAYS. pls pls pls pls pls pls pls.

i dyed my hair black tis time.
i jus got bored of the purple.
so yeah. waiting for it to take action and im off to shower.

okie. bye. nak kena gi nie skarang.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/03/2006 10:12:00 AM

fever. bad cough. sore throat.
uuuurrrggghhh!!!!

tank you to DDie for taking care of me.
making sure i eat every bit of my medicine.
the hourly calls at work to make sure im still up and kicking.
i seriously felt like dying.
i actually took 2 hours to rest cause i was spiking a fever of 38.4 degrees
but i refused to go home.
now okie la not tat bad..
still got my bad cough tho..

....and now DDie is sick. argh~

we went to watch Hostel.
erk.... i really dunno wad to sae about the movie.
it seems so porn-ish to me.
naked woman everywhere...
but.. its really gore too!!! eww.
really very YUCKS la.
i still wanna catch Scary Movie 4.

had Dikir meeting.
so we gonna have a shirt for the individual team.
Green and Yellow. Wooo Hoo so Brazil-like.
i like!
nex week dah start training.
please let me get well before i have to scream again.
hee...

finally after 7 days of straight work.. my off's are here.
im gonna sleep the whole day thru.
already make a promise with DDie..
TUESDAY is off day. no meeting and no calling.
just pure SLEEPING. hee. im okie with that. i hope.
met him just now and he already cut his hair..
worst.. HIS TAIL. haa. he seems sad but glad too. hee.
now we both good kids okie!

my blonde streaks are gone! yes.
my lip studs are gone! yes.

im clean. hee.

tats it i tink. i gotta sleep!

nite.

numero uno & ddie m.p

Y 5/02/2006 12:12:00 AM